The virtual world of pumpkin pie!

[zazajb]

Title: The virtual world of pumpkin pie!
Author: zazajb
Rating: PG-13, adult concepts, occasional language, M/M
Pairings/Characters: Jack/Ianto, Team
Spoilers – none, set mid S2
Summary: Competency assessments and some team fun time... Words 1230

Fic masterlist: http://zazajb.livejournal.com/6286.html

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters - just like to dabble with them from time to time

X-posted Jantolution , jackxianto & TW_classic [apologies to those getting this multiple times]

A/N Iantosdreamer and I were missing the redisourcolour challenges so we decided to challenge each other – her words for me - Theme: Halloween; oil, tyres, window, ‘Hey, it’s my turn now!

This is for crimsonkildare because Halloween is her favourite holiday - T&E x

 

The virtual world of pumpkin pie!

“Hey, it’s my turn now...” Owen grabbed the gun from Gwen and shoved her out of the way, “...you’ve had too long already..!” Gwen shoved back and snatched at the gun, catching Owen off balance...

Tosh giggled, watching as they wrestled for the weapon while Jack draped an arm around Ianto’s shoulders and the two of them gazed down like the indulgent parents of boisterous toddlers.

“Great idea to make a virtual game of the firearms competencies – I don’t think I’ve ever seen Owen so keen to do his annual review..!” Jack murmured into Ianto’s ear, “...I think it might be time to give them the other guns and set the test scene up before they start throwing punches...” nodding towards Owen who’d resorted to pulling Gwen’s hair in an attempt to distract her so he could grab the gun back!

Brushing his lips softly against his Captain’s, Ianto picked up the attaché case from the floor beside his feet and moved to the table where he opened it and removed three more virtual handguns while Jack waded into the scuffle that was escalating rapidly and pulled them apart – Gwen grinning victoriously as she brandished the weapon under the acerbic medic’s nose. Owen scowled at her, his expression morphing into one of delight when Ianto handed him a gun of his own...

Calling them all to order, Ianto explained the exercise which would be conducted in virtual conditions as he handed out pairs of futuristic goggles... “You each have unlimited ammo, the scene is set around Halloween – there are killer bats, weevils, the odd Hoix and maybe a vampire or two...you’ll have to make sure you don’t shoot any civilians...” he gave Jack a very stern look as he spoke, remembering the test session they’d had where Jack had insisted that the old people’s outing bus was really a gathering of chameleon Blusttions laughing at him through the window and so he’d blown them up in spectacular fashion!

“There could be all sorts of hazards and unexpected hiding places so you’ll need to keep alert... Ok, I think that’s about it for instructions so if you’re all ready..? He clicked the remote and the shooting gallery was transformed into a virtual world of dark and shadows, a dingy alleyway leading to a ramshackle scrap yard piled high with ancient wrecks of cars, piles of tyres and oil drums...numerous places for goblins and ghoulies to hide...

You’ve got fifteen minutes from...now!” and he pressed the button on his trusty stopwatch as he backed away up the stairs to the gantry so he could watch the proceedings from above...

The team scattered, each taking off in a different direction with the free abandon of children...a wicked grin spread across Ianto’s face...they needed reminding this wasn’t just a game... He pressed the remote again and a huge explosion rocked their virtual world as a massive ship like a giant pumpkin came crashing down from the sky and spilled out an army of the living dead...ok, so he might’ve forgotten to mention these..!

Tosh’s scream as she was surrounded by zombies brought the team running and the battle began in earnest...this was everything that was good about Torchwood – selfless support, innovative strategies, heroics and self-sacrifice [note to self – Jack treating his ability to die and revive way too casually...stern words required...]

Quick thinking soon concluded that a sonic wave would disable the zombies and Tosh was soon broadcasting the frequency through Jack’s wrist strap...the living dead exploded, showering the team with the seeds and slime of a pumpkin’s innards...it clung to their faces, in their hair and seeped through their clothes...

Before they had a moment to react to the slime assault they were bombarded by killer bats...attracted by the sonic wave...the team regrouped and tackled this new threat with gusto...a different signal was required to send the bats into retreat...only this wavelength brought forth dozens of weevils...

“I’m going to kill Ianto for this...” Owen muttered darkly as he narrowly missed having his throat ripped out and tripped heavily, smacking his head against a battered station wagon so hard he saw stars...

“Yea...me too...that pumpkin goo has gone right down my neck..!” Gwen gasped as she hauled the doctor to his feet after giving the weevil a face full of spray...”...but you gotta admit – this is so much fun..!”

A huge grin split Owen’s face, “...oh yeah...he’s good...I’ll give our tea boy that...he’s darned good..!”

“C’mon kids..!” Jack swept past them, Tosh on his coat tails as they rounded the weevils up and herded them into a usefully abandoned shipping container, slamming the doors closed just as Ianto sounded time up. ..

They stood grinning at each other, dripping with pumpkin seeds, faces flushed, clothes and hair completely dishevelled, panting hard...

Ianto came down the steps clutching his clipboard, stop watch and the remote...pristine in his dark gray pinstripe, claret shirt and striped tie... They looked at him...and down at their own rumpled attire and leapt as one at the Welshman, grabbing him and rolling him on the ground until he was as wonderfully in disarray as they were...the team laughing at his horrified expression..!

Jack pulled him to his feet and wrapped the spluttering young man into a huge bear hug before capturing his lips for a hot and messy kiss that was full of tongue and tasted unsurprisingly of pumpkin!

Ianto resisted for almost a nano-second before giving grasp-for-grasp as the rest of the team groaned loudly, chorusing...

“Put him down, Jack..!” in varying forms of polite – and not quite as polite! – language...

Jack released the now very breathless and red-faced Welshman , winding an arm around his waist to keep him close, as he addressed his team, “...excellent work one and all...” He took the remote from the still panting Ianto and pressed the ‘off’, dragging his goggles from his head as the shooting gallery re-emerged from the underworld...

Laughing and talking loudly, they made their way back up to the main hub where Ianto handed out steaming mugs of hot chocolate with whipped cream and large slices of pumpkin pie, grinning at them as they looked hesitantly at it...”no aliens were involved in the making of this pie...I promise!”

Tosh giggled loudly and took a bite...”...it’s nice...really nice...” she smiled round as they all followed her example... It was nice, Owen concluded as he reached for his second slice...who’d have thought it...killer bats, weevils, zombies...Halloween and pumpkin pie! Just another normal day for Team Torchwood... The usually acerbic medic grinned and leant a little closer to Tosh...

Jack grinned round at his team as they relaxed on the sofa, moving behind Ianto to wrap his arms round his waist and rest his chin on the Welshman’s shoulder... “...you know, I’m sure there are other, more innovative, ways we could use that virtual gear...” he murmured suggestively into his ear, nibbling lightly on Ianto’s earlobe and sending shivers down the young man’s spine...”...so if you’ve finished your pumpkin pie...”

End